Celebrate
‘You just want to feel up my tits, I know what men are like.’ I studied her chest for a few seconds. ‘Nothing there to feel up, I was hoping for a better look at your tiny panties and maybe what’s under them.’ ‘Not likely, you zipped me up, you aren’t getting a second chance.’ I slipped out of my trousers and into the sleeping bag and then closed my eyes. Pernilla lay her trousers on mine and slipped in beside me. I pulled the ground sheet over us and zipped up the sleeping bag. She drew my hand over her breast. ‘I’ll have you know that this is a prime b-cup tit.’ ‘You aren’t cold are you?’ ‘No, but what you’re doing isn’t helping in the slightest, go to sleep.’ We slept pretty well despite the hard mattress. I woke first and watched Pernilla sleep, unfortunately she woke soon after me. My watch told me it was still early but it’s hard to tell when you’re above the polar circle in late summer. ‘I was sure that you were going to have your evil way with me last night, I was quite. “Naked. Eat,” my client insists and stretches one appendage towards me at a disconcerting pace, like some creeptastic grabby baby hand, if babies were monster slugs.“Food.”Male reaching for me saying ‘food’. I’m having a déjà vu and a sudden yet overwhelming moment of clarity, an epiphany, a sad realization of the most profound proportions: I need a Change in my life. A big one. ASAP and at whatever cost.I toss the foodstuff – dried meat, some alien fruits, and the Vurn X’lora 15 equivalent of prawn crackers – into the reaching tentacle’s general direction and dance out of the way in an evasive maneuver that carries me across the room and towards the door to the bath.“Food. Then clean. Must be clean by taking bath,” I singsong like everything is perfectly wonderful in the city of Ba Sing Se, but my cheeks are straining with my fake smile and my upper lip is suddenly sweating with apprehension.Before the Dryth came to this bar, there had never been any incidents at this establishment.
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