"I haven't the faintest. Believe me, I'm hoping not." One of Colleen's thoughts suddenly brought a smug look to my old features."Well, I know one thing I won't miss." Haphazarding a guess as to the bane of most women, I looked at her with asinking feeling going through my chest and said, "Oh, _fuck_. You're nothaving your..." "You still have about three weeks or so. I just came out of my last oneabout a week ago." I wiped mock sweat off my forehead. Then looked at her hand. Even the bonestructure was different, more tapered, more elegant. "I've got girl-hands.Sort of a 'Seinfeld'-in-reverse kind of thing." "I wonder if he switched." Suddenly, sirens went off as cop cars went racing by. Evidently enough ofour police force had shook themselves off and mobilized. It sounded as ifthe government was beginning to realize it had to step in. ***That evening. Colleen and I stood in her apartment, looking at the form ofHillary Clinton speaking into the camera. "My fellow Americans, at this. I explained to him, despite her blushes, that I had fathered her when I was only a couple of months older than she was now, and he was more than happy to arrange an implant for her. He also got one of his young nurses to explain to her what effects this would have on her body, which spared both of us men the embarrassment.The bit that I couldn't escape doing myself was showing her a condom. I taught her how to open the pack without damaging the thin rubber with her fingernails, and with the help of a banana from the fruit bowl, I let her find out how to unroll one. It was a real weird feeling; but there are so many STI's out there these days that she needed to know how to protect herself from infection.I was real proud of her; she took the lesson seriously, and asked some sensible questions.All too soon, it was the day of her sixteenth birthday. I gave her some simple everyday jewellery, and together we chose some expensive perfume and a smart dress for her at the mall. I even agreed.
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