For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. For the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.Life has now been explained to you.There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me, I will be on the front porch!This one is compliments of chuckMinnesota Phone CompanyThere was a Minnesota phone company that was going to hire one team of telephone pole installers, and the boss had to choose between a team of twoNorwegian guys and a team of two Irish guys.So the boss met with both teams and said: "Here's what we'll do. Each team will be installing poles out on the new road for a day. The team that installs the most phone poles gets the job."Both teams headed right out.At end of the shift, Pat and Mike, the Irish guys, came back and the boss asked them how many they had installed. They said that it was tough going, but they'd put in twelve.Forty-five minutes later, Ole. Your elbows…. right straight through to your hands. The warm feeling flows right out of your fingertips. The same warm wave starts flowing through your legs, starting at your thighs… oozing downwards into your knees… then your calves… your ankles… and finally into your feet and flowing out through your toes. As this happens you feel your arms and legs growing extremely heavy and they sink further into your cushions. Now think of that warmth gathered up into one spot, which sits at the center of your stomach in a bright white ball. It sparkles like electricity as it tumbles and turns there. Wherever the white light flashes out to touch you can feel the muscles relax and the tension draining away. The ball of light starts to expand, growing to fill your entire torso now. Your chest relaxes, and your back feels very warm as the white light circulates through you. It washes outwards now to your arms and legs, which are now completely relaxed, and up into your head. You feel the tension.
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