I didn’t want to forget about any of this. If I hadn’t been leaning against a wall already, I might have fallen, but instead I just stood there frozen, focusing on my shaky breath. I couldn’t meet his eyes, but he didn’t seem to notice. ‘Well…’ I said, low and uncertain. ‘Rach, you know I have plenty of money.’ It was true. I also knew that I would at least get an hour or two of just us time if I agreed, so I did. We walked down to the street and hailed a cab, and the whole time my mind was whirling madly. I tried to recapture the confidence I’d had after my little masturbation session, with limited success. There was nothing to be done, no possibility of an ‘us’ — that much was painfully obvious to me. If Stephen had wanted an ‘us,’ he would have just kissed me. So the only solution here was to get over it as fast as possible — and what better place or way? I was in Vegas, I was brimming (kind of) with new-found sexual empowerment, and I was about to get a new outfit. Any other. Then the thought occurred to me."Why did you bring that up?" I asked."No reason," he said.What? There had to be a reason."Are you jerking off?" I finally asked."Oh, no, I'm not." Yes, you are. You're jerking off right next to your sister!" I turned on the light next to my bed, and I caught a glimpse of my brother's dick before he could throw the covers over himself."Turn off the light!" he cried."I will if you let me hear you jerk off." What do you mean?" I want to hear you masturbate like you heard me." Well, there's nothing to hear." I want to hear you anyway."I turned off the light. It was quiet again. I couldn't hear much. A minute or so went by."Are you masturbating?" I asked quietly."Just touching. It feels strange."Another minute went by in the dark."Does it feel good?" I whispered."Well, I do feel good but I'm not really trying very hard." I think it's okay. Does it help if I say it's okay?" It might."We were quiet again. I heard him moving his blanket. I imagined that he was.
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