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This required my’ non-Catholic fiancé, to take Catholic dogma lessons and sign papers raise our offspring in the faith. The civil paperwork was simple, just birth certificates and signatures.The parish priest initially was more difficult. He thought of me as a poor, young, Catholic girl taken advantage of by an older protestant. After the priest knew more about us and our families, he became less critical but admonished us in his pre-nuptial consulting not to use birth control. He explained, in detail, how it interfered with God's plan for marriage, the birth of children. He omitted mention of how medicine interfered with God's other plan, death.I kept my dogma heresies to myself and used the confessional to manipulate him. My confessions, untruthful since the first soapy shower, let me confess lies. The sanctity of confession meant he was gullible to what I said. In the dark confessional booth, I kneeled before his little screen door and turned him, convinced him my fiancé was. “Oh, there’s no need to be rude,” she replied, “I may be getting on a bit but I still know how to give a man a good time.”“Shutting up for five minutes would be a good start,” I suggested.“Eric my husband used to say that,” she said, “Mildred, that’s me Mildred, he said, ‘for heavens sake shut up and suck my willy.’ he always called his cock his willy, like a child, never his cock or penis or anything manly, always his willy.”“That is truly fascinating,” I said.“Horrible man,” she said, “He had high cholesterol so I always made sure he had a fried breakfast,”“So why did you marry him?” I asked.“Cause I was pregnant of course, and he had a job in Swallow bank,” she sighed, “Of course it wasn’t his, well probably not, I was seeing Tom Bradby and Mike Grimshaw, and Mike’s Dad, Alan from the corner shop, he slipped me twenty quid when I let him do me, that was a lot of money at the time, anyway me husband did me once when I got very drunk, and I mean I must have been very drunk to let him.
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