I tried to focus on the intricate piece of graffiti on the cement pole next to me, but it was a swirl of expressions like “glory” “liberty” “pussies more more pussies”. I recognized a few gang references and it only served to make my goosebumps raise higher from my body, almost painfully. I rested against the pole and closed my eyes.A guy’s elbow knocked against mine. I looked over at him and he was staring, a little creepy smile curving his lips. His teeth were yellow and he smelled heavily of cigarette smoke.Really, this wasn’t too strange an occurrence. But tonight I took about ten large steps away and pulled out my cell, eager to do something other than panic. We were all so lulled into a strange and false security that, if we had our cell on us and pretended to be invested on whatever was on the screen, we were safe.I had a dozen texts from Olivia, all different variations of her asking if I was okay.And of course I had a missed call from my mother.My train noisily pulled up and. When I was cooking, I was cooking. We had plenty of time to talk when we sat at the table together and ate what I cooked. It wasn't that he wasn't welcome in my kitchen, it was more like he didn't belong. Just like I didn't belong in his operating room.It was something that just kind of evolved. I think the fact that I messed up what I was making a couple of times because I was paying more attention to our conversation than to my cooking had a lot to do with it. I remember a batch of mashed potatoes that was extremely salty. Of course, these days I could probably have three or four conversations going on at the same time and everything would still come out right.I felt the soft warmth as Bozo rubbed up against my leg. I bent down and reached around his massive head, scratching his throat."What's the matter, Boy? You wanna go see him?"He just looked up at me."Go on." I added "Traitor" under my breath as he shot out of the kitchen.Bozo being anxious to see Daddy should count for.
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