We talk about everything else very deeply - and our sense of humour and fun with ourselves is strong. I know she loves me. She says and shows that is true often. But she can only say of this: 'It's impossible to explain. Even in my own language. I feel like I'm a mum now and not a lover.'I go upstairs one hot June night, about midnight. Michiko is fast asleep on her back. Our c***dren's nightlight shines in dimly from the hallway. I stare at Michiko hungrily. Her curves are subtly highlighted in the light's shadows, and I want her. I so love her and want her.She has on her usual night attire of thin cotton t-shirt and knickers, and the thin cotton sheet covers up to her waist. I look at her beautiful face. I remember, hungrily, our first time in Kichijoji, and other times. I stiffen a bit, sexually. Sometimes I've been so desperate I've even masturbated, carefully, next to her. She now moves position slightly, and the outline of her left nipple is obvious against her top. I'm even. ‘Honey are you ok, I asked where ya headed?’ she asked again. ‘I’m sorry ma’am I was really just surprised to see a lady driving one of these big trucks.’ I said, ‘To answer your question, Cambridge Massachusetts.’ She looked at me and smiled, ‘Honey you are going the wrong way this is west, Cambridge is east.’ She started braking to let me out. ‘No don’t stop ma’am I don’t have to be there till September.’ I told her about my drive to leave my parents town and get out into the world and how this was my first summer of freedom, EVER!. ‘Well then young man you are definitely out there, I never even heard of Grinnell. By the way I am Lila, you are?’ She laughed easily as we talked. I’m Mike ma’am, nice to meet you.’ ‘Ok Mike nice to meet you as well however since I am only 31 years old you better stop calling me ma’am and calling me Lila or I am gonna throw your ass out of my truck.’ She said grinning. ‘Yes ma.. Lila.’ I said. She told me she was recently divorced as her.
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