Sunday night Helena’s enthusiastic love making was almost too much for me. I tried to protest. Her hands held her habit tightly across my mouth so I could only grunt. I tried to move the cloth away.“Shh!” Helena hissed. “I’m from a silent order. I’m not supposed to speak. Neither are you.”She pushed a fold of her habit between my teeth, stuffing my mouth, while she rode me even more fiercely. I’m not sure whether I was u*********s before she had finished or immediately afterwards.I found it very difficult to get up on Monday morning. I was tired, so tired that Margaret was concerned. She brought me several cups of coffee during that day. That evening I decided I couldn’t face sister Helena. I didn’t make the drink. I didn’t say the incantation.Yet Helena appeared as if I had. Unlike all the other encounters with her and Phyllis, this time she rode me from the start. I was her plaything, her toy, even her victim. Instead of appearing beside me, she arrived on top of me, instantly. He really looked at himself for thefirst time. He was a six-year-old girl now. He was actually his ownniece and there was nothing he could do about it. It was his fault. Hedidn't know how he could be so foolish. He was in 'better shape' thanSuzy. She didn't deserve to die. He would make it up to her and herfamily by living her life well. He would carry on for Suzy. He owed itto his sister Joan too. She didn't deserve to lose her daughter. Hewould be the best little girl he could.He (he's a girl now and forever. he forced himself to think of herselfas she instead of he) she saw a toy and hugged it. It made her feel alittle better. She tried to 'play' with it but she really didn't knowhow. She had the body of a little girl, but not a girl's instincts. Thenext thing she tried was to watch some TV. But the V-chip parentalcontrols were up so high, that, SpongeBob SquarePants was considered too'scary' for her. She watched one of the few shows she was allowed, PeppaPig but it was too.
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