The short version is that this is why consent is such a useful frame. Some people might want to explore what happens if bad things are done to them. If they consent, then those bad things become OK.A lot of the other things I’m discussing here might be used as means of humiliating people. In these cases it’s possible to condemn the non-consensual humiliation without condemning the act used to inflict it. Forcing someone to fuck a dog is wrong because it’s non-consensual and calculated to dehumanise them, not because they’re fucking a dog. Still, it can’t be ignored that a lot of things that can be enjoyed consensually can also be used to torture someone, and lines can get blurry when it comes to consent. Where such blurred lines exist, extra safeguards are needed. AuthoritarianThis term means different things to different people, but I understand by it to mean that a formal power dynamic is involved. A teacher abusing their students; a drill sergeant forcing soldiers to perform. I was with Sarah in the change room one afternoon after swimming comps and just by chance all the other girls had finished changing and left to go to class, leaving Sarah and me together, suddenly she placed her hand on my bare arm and smiled so sweetly as she said ‘you were wonderful today Lauren, you swam so well’ I could feel myself blush and I naturally dropped my head a little, it was then I noticed that she had removed her swimmers and showered, but hadn’t yet started to dress for class, she still had hold of my arm and I felt the biggest rush I had ever experienced to that time, I was shaking a little and I was so aware of her moving closer! I could smell her wet hair and I will never forget the warmth and sweetness of her breath as she drew herself right up against me and pressed her cheek against mine, I had only gotten to the point of pulling my panties on before this happened and I thought I would die as I felt her breasts press against mine and her tummy touch me ever so.
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