‘I’d call social services if I wasn’t worried about you ending up in an even worse place than this.’ I squirmed as she stared down at me, her auburn hair pulled back from her face. She was a paralegal and was still dressed in her fancy work clothes. ‘You hungry?’ I shrugged. That was a good enough answer for her. She took me to her house and made me a turkey and cheese sandwich. When I inhaled that one in two minutes, she made me another. She also told me to drink a whole glass of milk, which I hated, but I did it anyway since she’d been so nice to me. ‘It’s good for your bones,’ she said. ‘It will make you big and strong.’ Well, I guessed she got that part right. Even though Caroline didn’t interfere in our family affairs, I always felt like she was keeping an eye out for me when I was growing up. One time in junior high, I helped her rake the leaves in her yard, and she asked me how school was going. ‘It’s okay,’ I said, ‘except for Algebra. I’ll be damned if I can wrap my head. ’‘Did I? Oh dear, was I that drunk. You know I’ve always said I wouldn’t have one. It’s really sore. Why isn’t it on my ankle and what is it anyway? It looks like a heart but it’s upside down?’‘No dear, it’s not a heart. You asked me to choose something so I thought I’d give you a Queen of Spades symbol.’‘A Queen of Spades?! What’s that for? I love a game of Blackjack at the casino but why a Queen of Spades?’Then it dawned on me that my little giggle might not be so funny. Last night it had seemed like a funny thing to do. I thought she’d know what it was and share the joke. Another big mistake. I was going to have to explain what it was or she’d probably show it to all her friends and workmates and someone was bound to tell her. Worse still, others who didn’t know her might see it and think … well you know what they’d think.‘Ahh … well … it’s a symbol that in some circles means you like black men.’‘Well I do like black men – some of them. Same as I like white men and all sorts of.
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