.And where is Cyndy anyway? She and the man who looks like a tv doctor went to brazil a week ago, like I think it was a week ago. I'd look on the calendar but I don't even know what day it is and how do you find what day it is on the calendar if you don't know what day it is? I can feel myself making that strained face that I make when I try to think. Like it seems she should be back by now and then it strikes me that maybe she's not coming back at all, like maybe she's left me here for good, just talking to the tape recorders in an empty mansion. And that's when I realize how incredibly stupendous is Cyndy's greatness. Its like beyond nuclear, it is nova, its like totally inconceivable and though I thought I loved her before I realize that wasn't true love compared to what I feel now. It wasn't love at all, cause I feel like so much love pouring out from me now that I know what I want to do. Like I want to roam the earth like a disciple proclaiming the gospel of Cyndy. I want to tell. I hated it. I can still remember some of the taunts of my schoolmates. So I am happy with my married name. I married David when I was just twenty-one and able to do as I wished and not as my mother demanded. I was the only daughter in a family of five. My two brothers are older and we don't see each other very much. Martin lives in Montreal, and Michael lives in Calgary."Martin is gay and has a live-in lover whom I've only met once. We get along fine but we don't have much in common. He's a graphic artist and does quite well I understand. Michael is married with one son and works in the oil industry. I don't know exactly what he does but apparently he's fairly high up in his firm. He takes after mother in many ways. So both my brothers are successes."She stopped for a moment a I saw a far away look for a few seconds before she returned to her narrative."David was a very dynamic personality. He had a clear vision of what he wanted when he graduated from university and he set about.
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