He asked again, “Where’s the nearest piece of unowned gold?”He got the same result as before. He shook the compass and examined it. It looked okay.“What’s the matter with this thing?”“I think that it’s telling you that there are no pieces of unowned gold near here.”Startled, Sean turned around to find George and Georgette standing there. The elves managed to look ethereal despite standing in the middle of a garbage dump.“Hello, George and Georgette. I didn’t know you were here, otherwise I would have greeted you,” Sean said.George said, “We were passing by and saw you sitting over here.”“You looked so dejected that we thought to come over and cheer you up,” Georgette said.“That was very nice of you,” Sean said.Georgette asked, “Why are you so down?”“Midsummer’s day is tomorrow and I don’t think I have enough gold to get my next gift of magic,” Sean said.“How much do you have?” George asked.“A nugget about the size of a lentil bean,” Sean said.George said, “That doesn’t sound like. "I'm Lance Wallace," I said, "Janice's husband."The others looked at each other somewhat apprehensively. You see, I had a reputation for being bad-tempered and jealous. You almost had to, being married to someone like Janice among a still male-dominated industry. By way of example, about ten years earlier, we were in a similar gathering, and a sawed-off Silicon Valley VP who considered himself God's gift to women followed Janice around the ballroom, repeatedly putting his hand on her ass. I had pulled him aside, introduced myself, and asked him politely to stop, but he only smirked at me and continued. I suppose he saw little threat from a 'house husband' like myself. Anyway, I had had enough. I had picked the little fellow up, went to the balcony of the third-floor ballroom, and tossed him off into a swimming pool below. I explained to our lawyer afterward I of course knew good and well the pool was down there, and the little creep didn't press charges as everyone around the industry.
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